My Anxiety :\

So this is something i hate talking about but mental health is important and people should be discussing it. This is something i still struggle talking about with close family members and friends. To be completely honest im finding it hard to word myself now. But maybe if one person can relate to this it might make them feel not so alone because i know i do sometimes.

I can’t remember exactly when my anxiety kicked in, however i remember in year six having my first panick attack. When i look back at it the situation it’s self wasnt that bad but i guess it had to start somewhere. It was like suddenly the air was knocked out of me and i couldn’t breath and then people around me started to panick. Next thing you know im in the office laying on the ground feet elevated with the school nurse trying to get me together. The memory its self is quite blurry so i think that’s all the detail i have of that.

Anyway as time went on i was slowly learning to control it but that was knocked right out of the window last year. Id rather not go fully into depth about this but lets just say i went through some major family problems and changes . So because home life wasnt spectacular i counted a lot on my friends ,but then one day they just flipped. Bullying started and the anxiety just starts getting worse. On the bright side i was out of that school just before christmas when my mum decided the best choice was a change .

You would think new start new me , unfortunately that’s not how it works. Anxiety doesn’t just go away it needs to be helped rather than discarded and everyone around me thought just because the problem was over i was better. So while everyone ,myself included, ignores it the anxiety doesn’t go away .

So finally about a little over a month ago i asked my mum if i could see someone because i could see that it wasnt just going to disappear anymore. With a bit of an explanation why and the past year not being so great for me she agreed and thought it was fine. I’ve been seeing my counselor/therapist for three weeks now and its hard hearing a professional tell you what you already know and i bet its hard for my mum to start accepting its nothing.

What im trying to say is anxiety isn’t something you can just brush under the rug and pretend it isn’t there. It can come in all different forms for all different people. There are ways to deal with it which can make your life that little bit easier.

So just a quick tip if you ever suffer from anxiety major or not ; whenever you start to feel a bit anxious take a deep breath and start counting down from ten or twenty, whatever you prefer. Believe it there is a scientific reason why this works i just can’t put it into words.I hope that with me being a little more honest with you ,could possibly help yourself.
if you have any advise to share with me or others please and if you’d like me to do another post like this let me know.

remember it’s okay to put yourself first sometimes,

Little British girl xoxo

 

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2 thoughts on “My Anxiety :\

  1. Sorry to hear you suffer from anxiety, I know how isolating and overwhelming it can be at times. The books “we’re all mad here” – Claire Eastham and “Fuck Anxiety” – Robert Duff were super helpful for me so I definitely recommend you give them a read.

    Liked by 1 person

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